Bad B*tches Wear White...After Labor Day.

Why can't I wear white after labor day? Why do we still follow antiquated societal standards? When did we decide that LABOR DAY was the end of summer? By gosh, these are the times of global warming! Summer doesn't end in August anymore! The first day of fall isn't even until September 22nd! I will wear white until the day it pleases me not to! Does anybody still follow this ridiculous rule? As far as I can tell, it doesn't look like it. Time magazine had a pretty interesting article on the tradition, thank goodness because we're not here to debate this tradition: we're here to wear white. After Labor Day. I know, we're positively scandalous.

One weekend (last year) shortly after Labor Day, I grabbed a couple willing girlfriends and dragged them down to the bougie and v. aesthetically pleasing Worth Avenue on the island of Palm Beach to take fabulous, silly pictures. If you're not local or bougie, you might have never heard of Worth Avenue, but it's the SoFlo equivalent of Rodeo Drive. Now you know. Without further ado, here is our very serious fashion shoot.

 Jessie is rocking a high pony and wearing a white lace peplum dress by Guess, a chunky blue double-strand necklace, and pointy toed nude pumps.

Jessie is rocking a high pony and wearing a white lace peplum dress by Guess, a chunky blue double-strand necklace, and pointy toed nude pumps.

 I'm wearing a Nasty Gal maxi skirt and a tan and white striped linen crop top from Nordstrom. My red sunnies have gold accents and are winged AF.

I'm wearing a Nasty Gal maxi skirt and a tan and white striped linen crop top from Nordstrom. My red sunnies have gold accents and are winged AF.

 Jessica is going VOGUE, BABY! She's wearing a high collared lace dress that's probably from TJ Maxx and some sexy, strappy, tan leather peep-toe sandals. How's that for descriptive?

Jessica is going VOGUE, BABY! She's wearing a high collared lace dress that's probably from TJ Maxx and some sexy, strappy, tan leather peep-toe sandals. How's that for descriptive?

 Cropping that metal circle on the ground was out of the budget. Pumps are by Sam Edelman and happen to be the exact same style the Bryce Dallas Howard wore in Jurassic World. They are the best shoes in the world.

Cropping that metal circle on the ground was out of the budget. Pumps are by Sam Edelman and happen to be the exact same style the Bryce Dallas Howard wore in Jurassic World. They are the best shoes in the world.

 Jessie is the newly crowned queen of the bennnnnnd and SNAP! This is her good side. Did you notice her necklace matches the Tiffany blue awnings in the background? Of course it does.

Jessie is the newly crowned queen of the bennnnnnd and SNAP! This is her good side. Did you notice her necklace matches the Tiffany blue awnings in the background? Of course it does.

 Somebody needs to chisel this girl in stone because she. can. WORK. IT. 

Somebody needs to chisel this girl in stone because she. can. WORK. IT. 

 This photo is part actors posing and part girlfriends laughing at penis jokes. We never said we were mature. If it looks like we're glowing, we are. This is hour 2 of our photo shoot and it was HOT. We called the Leopard Lounge to see if they were serving alcohol at 9:30. They were, so we ordered three mimosas and called it a day!

This photo is part actors posing and part girlfriends laughing at penis jokes. We never said we were mature. If it looks like we're glowing, we are. This is hour 2 of our photo shoot and it was HOT. We called the Leopard Lounge to see if they were serving alcohol at 9:30. They were, so we ordered three mimosas and called it a day!