Two Girls, One Blog, and an Epic Wedding Reunion!!

 
 

How do you prepare for a trip across the country to be in your best friend’s wedding? First, jump up and down in excitement since you’ll be in the same place as your best friends from college for the first time in over a year. Second, figure out how much time you’re working with. At this point, I have 3 days and 35 hours of work time within those 3 days to plan around. Next, you take the few hours you have and prepare yourself a luxe breakfast, turn on your wax pot to let it heat up for far longer than it needs to, throw in a load of laundry and forget about it, and binge as many netflix shows as possible since the bridesmaid agenda doesn’t allow for a House of Cards marathon.

Hi, I’m Giuliana and I'm a professional procrastinator. Sometimes, I get around to doing the things I need to do, usually when I should be doing something else, like when I have a writing deadline. Whether it’s for my job, for a freelance assignment, or for a personal project, I seem to work best under pressure--which is an ambitious way of acknowledging that the only time I get my life together is when I absolutely have to. But I prefer saying I like the hustle.

Now that my wax pot is hotter than necessary my brows are on point and I can barrell forward with my travel preparations. Mandatory items get packed first.

  1. Bridesmaid dress--luckily it’s a sheer material that doesn’t wrinkle when folded so I don’t have to worry about that.

  2. My journal and four books that I’m currently reading at the same time go right into my carry-on. Not sure what I’ll be in the mood to read so I have no choice but to bring them all!

  3. The sparkly platform heels that I bought for my NYE night out with Alexa will definitely be making a reappearance for the first time since.

  4. Laptop. As a freelancer, you gotta love the hustle.

  5. Melatonin and a reloaded Starbucks app. You can call me basic, but I gotta sleep when I have time to sleep and I gotta be at the top of my game for every other hour of this trip.

  6. All the clothes I tried to clean out of my closet but Alexa claimed for her own.

  7. Headphones because I can’t sleep in silence and bae can’t sleep unless it’s silent.

  8. Cat treats because of course we selected an AirBNB solely because we’ll be hosted by a cat and we don’t want to come empty handed.

An Alexa and Giuls reunion is a reliably fantastic event every time, so there’s more excitement than stress. The bride, of course, is also one of our best friends so we’re taking this reunion to the next level. Alexa’s in charge of the bride’s beauty routine and I’m the keeper of the bride’s vape. Alexa, as always, will make sure everyone looks FAB and I’ll make sure the bride’s relaxed and everyone’s constantly giggling so there’s no time for stress. (Hey, it’s Portland, it’s totes legal and way less sloppy than popping champagne for every minor “crisis”.) We are the damage control duo and excited to be back in action.

Stay tuned on our social media!!! We’ll be spoiling you with pictures, videos, and legendary quotes at @fabfeministblog across all platforms, and we may even indulge you with an impromptu blog entry (that is, if we're feeling ambitious). There’s a TON to celebrate and you’re invited to front row seats to our shenanigans!!!!!!

BIG NEWS, Y'ALL.

 
 

We've got big news to announce! I know I haven't been the best at creating the kind of content this blessed audience wants to read on the regular. I know the blog was down for a couple months with no explanation. And I know we haven't been as here for you as you want us to be. WE WILL DO BETTER! That's why, without further ado, I want to announce some big fucking news! Our long-time contributing writer and my college confidant, Giuliana, from Princeton, NJ, will be joining Fab Feminist as a regular writer and BUSINESS PARTNER!!!!

After a zillion marathon phone calls and inspirational conversations, we realized that trying to do the blogger thing on our own was 1) way too hard, and 2) half as fulfilling as working together. What does this mean for you, oh valued reader? This means double the content that you want to read starting right now. It means TONS of relevant and exciting new things on the horizon. It means a dash of some blogger REALNESS that we feel does not exist among our peer "lifestyle" bloggers (very little shade intended).

We're here. We're millennials. We're working full-time jobs, second jobs, and finding the time in between to create content we think the world deserves to read. We're a little broke. We're not perfect. We are NOT here to represent a perfect life, a perfectly messy bun, a perfect $2,499 tote bag, marble counters, or monochrome (unless it's black, tbh). We're here to serve some working-girl realness as best friends living on opposite ends of the east coast trying our damnedest to fiercely support each other because we know we can't do it alone.

We see each other once or twice a year and have collaborative phone calls weekly (a conservative estimate). We're both trying to create our best selves as we gradually evolve from excited, wide-eyed college graduates to hustling, real-life adults and we have A LOT to say. We both believe in the power of feminism, the importance of inclusivity, and the bravery that both require. That's why we've changed our blog name from Fab Fucking Female to Fab Feminist: because we want our blog to represent the diversity of our fan base.

Thank you for being here for us.

If you would like to find out more about our mission and about our team, click here. We'll be switching the website domain to represent our change of name, but not until our current domain expires. You’ll know when it happens! (Subscribe!) If you'd like to donate a cash gift, to keep us going, you can do so here.

If you want to write for us, send us an email to find out how. We are EXCITED to embark on this journey with you. Here's to change!

CLICK HERE to read our most recent post about our trip to Seattle & Portland!

I'm a Shameless Basic, Whatever, I'm Over it, Let's go to Starbucks.

Ya’ll I had the most basic bitch Thursday you have ever known. I’ve leveled up farther than I ever thought possible. I mean, I drank I drank a Starbucks venti mocha latte and bought my first VS bra in years (YEARS, PEOPLE). ALSO. I have been converted to the bralette. My boobs look so perky and old-school. 10/10 recommend. Then I went to the Apple store and had them fix a thing. I got my toenails painted (My body is decidedly NOT a wonderland I mean my technician was practically shoveling cuticle it was disgusting) and bought three bottles of Champagne for New Year’s Eve JUST TO PREGAME. (Korbel is $4 less/bottle if you go to Trader Joe’s).

I ordered myself the Ink + Volt 2017 planner. I am ecstatic to use it. I reorganized my workout drawer and filled in my brows. Then I drove to a hip fucking coffee shop (Common Grounds Coffee Bar in Lake Worth, FL) next to Florida’s greatest record store (Top Five Records), ordered a lavender London fog and SAT DOWN TO WRITE THIS BLOG POST. I’m disgusting. Did I mention my hair’s in a messy bun and I’m in athletic wear? OF COUSE IT IS/I AM. YOU LOVE IT BECAUSE YOU WISH YOU COULD BE AS BASIC AS MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE FREE YOURSELFFFFFFF.

The only thing I haven’t done today is take a selfie. But there are still five hours and fourty-five minutes left of this day SO ANYTHING IS POSSIBLE.

 

Read More

Must-Have Books, RE: Honing Your Fab

Fab Fab Fab. We all want to be Fab. How do we achieve Fab? Is it like Inner Peace? Or Enlightenment? What defines Fab? Fab is whatever the fuck you want it to be. Fab is sticking to your guns. Fab is not giving a fuck what society, or even your friends, thinks of your outfit because ~you~ like it, and that is all that matters. Fab is a face mask at 8:30 in the morning on a weekday. Fab is spending dawn til dusk hustling that $$$. Fab is focusing on your Mindfulness. Fab is dripping sweat and pumping weights. Fab is skipping the gym and eating fantastic food. Fab is saying, "Fuck you, gender norms." Fab is doing what is important to YOU. Fab is having the discipline to acknowledge and hold yourself to your standard of Fab. 

I really hate the term/genre "self-help." Self-help books are trendy. They're like, "MY WAY OR THE HIGHWAY, BITCHES." They take themselves too seriously. They're into weird stuff. They're so dry. They assume that what works for them works for everyone. And we know that's not true. So without further ado, I want to share with you some books that *I* love to help in honing your Fab. That sounds fucking hokey; I get it. I'M VERY SELF AWARE, YOU GUYS. But I think it's better than "self-help," IMHO. Feel free to reread that sentence and replace "honing your Fab" with "self-help," tho. I hope it bothers you that the word "help" is in that sentence twice if you do.

The Tao of Pooh by Benjamin Hoff

The Tao Te Ching, which The Tao of Pooh is based off of, is SO OLD. SOOO old. Older than Jesus Cuervo. Wait. No, that's right. Pronounced like it's written in an alternate spelling of the title, Dao De Jing, the Tao Te Ching informed a few schools of thought you might have heard of (Confucianism, Chinese Buddhism). I had to read it as part of a philosophy class in undergrad and really enjoyed it. I recommend the version translated by Stephen Addis and Stanley Lombardo (ISBN-13: 978-0-87220-232-0). It's easy to digest and you can thumb through it if you don't feel like reading it cover-to-cover (each page just contains a poem or artwork).

The Tao of Pooh is somehow longer than the original Tao, but it's very amusingly written and uses text from the Winnie the Pooh and the Tao, as well as some (obviously fictional) conversations between the author and Pooh to support Hoff's claim that Pooh is a Taoist. Both books have survived many a book purge, and I highly recommend it.

Grace's Guide: The Art of Pretending to be a Grown-Up by Grace Helbig

Grace Helbig is overall one of my favorite humans. She exists on the Internet and is YouTub- famous for her channel It's Grace, and last year she had a very charming show on E! Network that Khloe Kardashian kinda ripped off. If you're familiar with Grace already, her voice starts to creep into your brain as you read, narrating the book for you (I'm pretty sure Grace is a wizard. Or Carrie Bradshaw). If you're not already familiar with Grace, this is a great way to learn about the Grace Way of living your life. It's funny and amusing and easy to read (I bet you're seeing a theme here). Grace talks about almost all of the things, from coping with anxiety to making adult friends to not decorating like you still live in a college dorm room. The only thing I would add to this book is a chapter on, like, maybe nice things you should do to keep your relationship afloat? She goes straight from navigating a date to surviving a break-up, which to me is like getting a salad and dessert and skipping the main course. That and maybe a chapter on how to care for one's demonic lady box because I STILL AM PRETTY SURE I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT'S GOING ON DOWN THERE.

All in Good Taste by Kate Spade New York

If Grace Helbig is my favorite human, Kate Spade New York is the Grace Helbig of designers in my little world. She is the best. Kate Spade is the DEFINITION of Fab. (At least, my definition of it, we already established that Fab is defined as whatever you want it to be, don't forget). All in Good Taste is a completely comprehensive look at how to totally own your social life and become the classiest fucking person you have ever met. AND it doubles as a fantastic coffee-table book.

The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up by Marie Kondo

I know what you're thinking! You don't have to tell me. "This shit again? This fucking book? If I hear one more goddamn thing about that KonMari Method I am going to shit my--" See? I told you I knew. But this book is life-changing, OK? I swear on my Star Wars Weekend 2014 Limited Edition Storm Trooper Pin, this book is NOT FULL OF SHIT. Now that we've established that you can trust my judgement because, again, Star Wars Weekend 2014 Limited Edition Storm Trooper Pin, let me tell you why this book is good. This book is good if you feel morally obligated to hold onto shit you don't like because your grandma gave it to you. This book is good if your method of clothing organization is "clean pile/dirty pile" or "floor is biggest shelf in room." This book is good if you never feel like you have everything totally clean all at once. However, this book absolutely falls into the "they're into weird shit" category. Socks DON'T have feelings, Marie Kondo! I don't care what you say! But it is a completely new and innovative way of organizing your life, and it's worth a shot, if nothing else, to see what works for you and what doesn't.

 

'Pride and Prejudice' Palatial Estate on the Market

In case you haven't yet heard: Wentworth Woodhouse, which, ironically, doesn't appear to be made of wood, is ON THE HOUSING MARKET. Fun fact of the day, it's also highly likely that it was the inspiration for Mr. Darcy's Pemberley

 East front of the Wentworth Woodhouse, taken May 2015 (Wikipedia)

East front of the Wentworth Woodhouse, taken May 2015 (Wikipedia)

THAT'S RIGHT. YOU, YOURSELF, CAN* OWN MR. DARCY'S PALATIAL WONDERLAND FOR THE LOW, LOW PRICE OF $12.5 MILLION. (That's eight million quid for you locals.) Click here for the listing.

 West front of the Wentworth Woodhouse (Savills)

West front of the Wentworth Woodhouse (Savills)

What will you get for your $12.5 million, you ask?  More than 300 bedrooms (apparently nobody's up to the task of counting exactly how many rooms there are), 124,600 square feet of house, five miles of indoor corridors, 82 acres, a stable, no listed bathrooms, a couple "redundant" teaching rooms added in the 1970s that I assume you'll probably just want to demolish, the longest country house facade in Europe and apparently $40 million in estimated renovations (LOL, WHATEVER).

 Wentworth Woodhouse Dining Room, (Savills).

Wentworth Woodhouse Dining Room, (Savills).

Just to put into perspective how much of a bargain-of-the-century this is, Taylor Swift's New York City apartment costs $7.4 million more. Jennifer Lawrence spent $8.2 million on a paltry five-bedroom, 5,500 square-foot cottage. And, most shocking of all, a solid gold baby bassinet is also going for $12 million.

Anybody wanna go halvsies with me?

*According to the ever-so-reliable Wikipedia, a sale was agreed upon in November 2015. But, hey, a girl can dream, right?